Items I bought while I was moderately drunk and momentarily believed in magic: The Diva Cup

Look, tampons are really, really expensive. A friend of mine, who will not be named, convinced me to make this purchase based on several (at what the time seemed) very convincing factors as to why I should make the switch from sticking cotton up my vag, to using a safe plastic cup to retain my monthly vaginal secretions. I was leery of this since I had always known one way of dealing with my flow each month and had really not taken the time to educate myself on alternatives. Yes, I'll admit, I was swayed by magic. According to the instructions;

"The DivaCup™ is very sanitary, comfortable, reliable and convenient. It holds one full ounce (30 ml). Since the entire cycle is an average of 3-4 ounces (90-120 ml), most women find that the cup is not even half full after 12 hours. The vagina is continually self-cleansing, washing away dead cells and bacteria. Tampons absorb the natural fluids that we need to keep the vagina clean and moist. The DivaCup™ is non-absorbent and simply collects the menstrual flow, leaving the natural moisture level in the vagina undisturbed. Depending on your flow empty the cup 2-3 times per 24 hour day, wash and reinsert. It can be worn up to 12 hours, even overnight. The DivaCup™ is ideal for all activities including swimming, camping, backpacking, and travelling. It is suitable for all menstruating women of all ages."

MAGIC!!! So I bought it. Yes, I'd had a few beers prior to purchase. Yes, the lovely little carrying sack was a nice purple color and I'm like a crow who spots shiny things and must have them when I see the color purple. I'm not going to go into very many details regarding its use (which ended up to be at most, during three of my cycles), I'll just say that I laugh too hard, too often and being in a public, engaged in a social activity when your DivaCup™ "pops out" gets old after a while. Yep. You heard me. Needless to say, I'm back to good ol' cotton. Sigh.